


Young at Heart

by mrs_schoolweek



Series: Spotty the Ghoul [2]
Category: Fallout (Video Games), Fallout: New Vegas
Genre: Alcohol, Anxiety, Drug Use, Gen, Machete references, Non-binary character, Prostitution, Self-Harm, wild west shootout
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-07
Updated: 2017-03-07
Packaged: 2018-09-30 13:22:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,562
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10163909
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mrs_schoolweek/pseuds/mrs_schoolweek
Summary: Raul gets crazy bitter, Spotty tries to lift his mood. Hurt-comfort and bromance-kind of stuff.





	

"Raul, open the door", Spotty demanded. Raul sighed.  
"Can't an old man use a toilet without being disturbed", he answered, voice heavy and grumpy. Spotty took lockpick from it's pocket.  
"No, if he's there cutting himself with my razor blade, Raul. Open up or I'll pick the lock" it told him. The threat was enough: Raul clicked the bathroom door open. Expression on his face was tired and bitter.  
"Okay, boss, it's open now. Want to stay when I cut myself some more?" he growled in frustration. Spotty didn't seem amused.  
"I'd prefer not to. Give me the razor or I'll come take it, Raul", it answered, jaw tightened and fingers stirring. Raul shrugged and gave the razor to the other ghoul. He wasn't in the mood for a fight. Spotty took it, placed it to a pocket and looked at Raul.  
"I'd really like to see your hands now, pal. Come on, let's get to kitchen and check them out under a proper lighting", the Courier said and, not waiting for a permission, swung it's arm around the other ghoul.   
"Whatever you say, boss."

"These are... Raul, how long have you been doing that?", Spotty whispered, running it's fingers along the man's scarred forearm, now sticky with blood.  
"I don't know, boss. A hundred years? Why should I stop now?" he muttered and pulled his hand away. Fellow travelers or not, this was none of Spotty's business.  
Spotty thought otherwise. It went looking for a bottle of purified water and a clean-ish rug. Not caring about Raul's objections, Spotty started to wipe it's friend's forearms clean with gentle hands. The cuts weren't too deep yet there were many. And below them, scars of countless more.  
"I've always wondered... What is it with ghouls and self-harm? At least half of us do it as far as I know", Spotty asked him. Raul looked tense.  
"I think you can't really call this "harming", boss. These are barely scratches, see? Besides, my skin's ruined anyway. There's no point in saving it", he mumbled and shrugged his shoulders. It just helped him with anxiety, that's all.  
"Does it make you feel good then, Raul? There's got to be a reason for you doing that", Spotty insisted, not letting go of it's friend's hand.   
"I don't know, boss. Maybe it... I really don't know", Raul sighed. Spotty took a bandage roll and started to wrap his firearms, a sad smile on it's face.  
"You want me to try too and tell you how I felt?"  
With one forceful move, Raul grabbed Spotty's jacket and pulled the other ghoul close to him.  
"Never say that again, boss. You hear me? Never", he growled. Spotty's eyes widened in surprise and worry. It put it's palms on Raul's shoulders and pressed him back down onto a chair.  
"I won't. If you don't cut yourself again, Raul."  
"We'll see, boss."  
"No. I want to see you promise right now."

Spotty's noselessness was just a couple of inches away from Raul's face. Both ghouls stared at each other, not quite sure what to say. Raul's brow started familiar twitching.  
"You want to say something, pal? Or let go of old Spotty's jacket?", Spotty asked softly, patting the man's shoulder once more. That seemed to wake him up. Raul let go of the fabric and leaned back.  
"Sorry, boss. I'm just a little moody today, okay? Let's get something to eat and stop this", he suggested, embarrassed by his own actions. He shouldn't have been caught in the first place. Spotty took a seat opposite Raul but didn't look like stopping.  
"You're not "a little moody", Raul. You have cut yourself for a hundred years. What is it about? Please, tell me", it asked, desperation echoing from it's words. That made Raul feel worse than his cuts.  
"You know, I get a little restless sometimes. Nothing too serious, you know, just this uneasy yet tired feeling. Sometimes I tinker with electronics, sometimes I clean my gun or press a cigarette against my arm... And sometimes I cut a little to calm down, okay? It's not a big deal, boss", he muttered. But that was a lie of course. Sometimes he felt so damn bad and aching he would have just wanted to end it all. Spotty knew that.  
"Raul, you're a fool if you think I believe that. Look at me, please. Tell me. What was it about today?" it asked, raspy voice soothing Raul like warm water.  
"You're a fool sometimes, boss. It could have worked. My knees and back just hurt. There's nothing more to it, really. That's what being a ghoul is about, right Spotty? That most of the things hurt and only very few feel nice", he told and tried to smile to the other ghoul. Spotty didn't smile back.  
"Raul, you should say things like that to me! I have chems for you if you need them. We can walk a little slower if that helps you. And hell, you're not going to carry all our water next time. But Raul..." Spotty looked almost desperate, a hand reaching for Raul's hand. The man wasn't quite sure if he should hold it or not. He decided to reach back anyway.  
"You are not well. Please, let me help you. I'm a ghoul and I still enjoy many things. It worries me that you feel that bad", Spotty told him, touching his fingertips with it's own.  
"Puking rainbows and sugar again, boss?", Raul snarked, a joyless smile on his mouth. Spotty shook it's head.  
"Hell no. I'm going to fix you, old man."

After fifteen furious minutes of searching supplies from it's backpack, Spotty returned to Raul.  
"First, you drink this. Let's get your rads up and cuts healing", it ordered, holding a Nuka-Cola Quantum. Raul took it, smiling really this time. Boss sure knew what made him feel good. Spotty smiled as well: it loved feeding him all kind of little treats.  
"Then, let's get a little relaxed, okay? Just so your back eases", Spotty suggested, putting two Ultrajet inhalators on the table. Raul scowled.  
"How do you getting high ease my back, boss", he had to ask. Spotty grinned.  
"You'll see."  
"Boss, these are worth good money. You shouldn't waste them on old ghoul like me", Raul protested. Spotty shook it's head.  
"I can waste both on old ghoul like me, then. Does that sound better, Raul?" it teased, knowing the man wouldn't let it get too high.  
"I'd love to get wasted before we get going", Spotty giggled. Raul took one of the Ultajets and inhaled it, shaking his head.  
"Not happening, boss", he muttered. All worries and anxiety started to melt away. The drug swarmed in his lungs like a living thing. Spotty looked pleased and handed him a couple of Mentats (the special ones it liked to contaminate with cesium).  
"What's this, boss? You're going to get ol' Raul all feral", the man wondered, not too reluctant though. If this was how he'd get over with everything... Why the hell not?  
"No, Raul, I'll give you Rad-away afterwards, okay. Just trust me. We'll kick start your dopamine and endorphin flow for good", Spotty promised and huffed Ultrajet. A wicked grin spread on it's face and it turned to look at Raul:  
"Or maybe we'll get a little feral today, pal. Come on, have some candy."

Spotty was bad influence on him... Or was it? Raul chuckled and looked at his friend. The other ghoul looked so damn jovial it actually reminded him of his own youth and sharing joints with his friends... Hell, he had always been like this.  
"You look happier, Raul. But that's not enough. Ol' Spotty will help you get sweet as a peach and happy as a pancake. No more cutting yourself, okay? I'll show you how to feel awesome", Spotty whispered and took a couple of Mentats. Raul smirked and took some as well.   
Oh. This was why Spotty used cesium.   
Colors tuned to a brighter frequency. Raul could feel how blood circulated in his body. Spotty's breathing sounded musical all the sudden. The man felt a surprising urge to sing.  
"See? Now, gear up, Raul. We go hunting", Spotty growled and dashed to grab it's shotgun. That sounded amazing... Bur somewhere behind all the giddy tickling and humming was still some common sense left.   
"I'm not sure we should, boss", Raul muttered. Spotty shook it's head:  
"We absolutely should. A gang of thugs has been threatening people of Freeside, Raul! We're the jackhammer of Wasteland justice, man! Come on, let's go and be heroes!"  
Raul still didn't quite agree... But his legs did.

They ran so fast it would have hurt if they weren't so high. Along the way, Spotty half-forced irradiated whiskey down Raul's throat and dios mio, it felt strange!  
Blood rushed through Raul's veins like euphoric fire and he felt like he was twenty again.   
"You sure I'n not going feral, Spotty?" he asked, breathless. Spotty laughed so hard the man felt the vibration.  
"Hell no, Raul! You're going sane again!", it yelled and loaded it's shotgun:  
"Come on, show Spotty what you're made of!"

"I bet fifty caps they surrender when they see us", Spotty hollered and sprinted forward. On it's face was a grin Spotty probably thought would look bloodthirsty, but which Raul considered hilarious.  
"I bet fifty they don't have time to surrender", Raul roared and ran to Spotty's side again. Their hearts beat like war drums and sand and dust rose from the ground beneath their feet. They ran all the way to the gang's hideout (which wasn't too hidden,actually) and punched each others jovially on the way. The gang had a camp (or as they saw it, a fortress) under a half-collapsed highway. Ideal location for a shootout without bystanders getting in the middle.  
"I bet fifty I'll kill more than you", Spotty laughed and slapped Raul's shoulder blue-ish. Raul growled in return and elbowed Spotty's arm in a friendly manner.  
"I bet a hundred I'll put them down before you, loco!"

Those thugs might actually have surrendered: despite the fact Raul and Spotty were high as balloons, they were the badass adventurer duo everybody had heard about. With their scarred, exposed skins and slightly feral looks they seemed actually pretty terrifying. Unluckily, the thug leader (biggest and dumbest one) started by aiming Spotty with a machine gun.  
"Is she your roadkill cunt, stupid-hat", he yelled at Raul, a cocky smile on his lips.  
"Spotty is NON-BINARY!", Raul yelled back and split the thug leader's smile with a well-aimed bullet. All hell broke loose.  
Raul took down two snipers from the top of the highway before they managed to get either of the ghouls on scope. A large, muscular thug with a sledgehammer came rushing on them. Spotty blasted his knees to bloody mess and finished the job with a razorblade.   
"You are so dead, zombies!" yelled a thug armed with two nailguns and sprinted towards them.   
"We're ghouls, asshole", Spotty roared back and knocked the thug down with a shot to the groin. Raul emptied a clip to the man's head and grinned to Spotty.  
"Nailed it, boss!"  
Suddenly a bright flash and a thunder-like rumble blinded them. Raul dropped the ammo he was about to reload and grabbed Spotty down with him. They crawled behind a car wreck .  
"They have a rocket launcher!" Spotty groaned, hands on the sides of it's head. If it had had some ears left before, they were probably gone now: the blast had deafened it and hurt like hell.  
"I know, Spotty! Man up - I mean ghoul up and let's get back and fight! They might suck at shooting that but if we keep ducking here, they'll wrap us up like burritos!" Raul growled and groped his pockets for more bullets. Fuck.  
"I kinda dropped my shotgun there", Spotty mumbled.

"Look at me, Spotty! What do you still have with you?", Raul demanded and grabbed his friend's shoulder. The other ghoul seemed to calm down a bit.   
"I have my switchblade and more Ultrajet", it answered and pulled two inhalators from it's pocket.  
"Spotty, we are not going to-", before Raul managed to finis his sentence, Spotty huffed one of the drugs and grinned.  
"What do you still have, old vaquero?" it snarled. That hit Raul like a shot of tequila.  
"My hot Mexican temper!" he responded, grabbing the other Ultrajet. This was so damn stupid - the drug kicked in. This was so damn great!  
"The dead thug over there had a machete", he yelled and sprinted from the cover like a rusty, 200-year-old arrow. Spotty followed him with a feral cry. The car behind them exploded in missile impact.

Waves of heat and radiation flushed over them like water. But they weren't the only ones: remaining thugs staggered and their shots missed their targets. But for Spotty and Raul, the blast wasn't as much harmful as it was refreshing. Their ears rang in ecstasy and their muscles greeted the invisible force with a wonderful sensation of burning.  
"The one with the launcher, now!" Spotty managed to call out. Raul tugged the machete from the dead man's belt and followed his friend, bellowing.  
Two more thugs rushed to protect the missile-launching man. Raul cracked one's skull open with a ferocious swing. Spotty slashed the other's throat so deep, blood flushed it's chest like shower. The launcher thug stumbled backwards in terror.  
"I just wanted to bang girls and beat up assholes, you freaks", he cried. Behind the two ghouls, someone loaded a shotgun. Spotty and Raul glanced each other.  
Spotty jumped forward, burying it's razor blade handle-deep in the launcher thug's abdomen. Raul turned around and threw his machete straight between the last standing thug's forehead.  
"Raul, down", Spotty yelled and it's friend obeyed. The last missile hit the thug to his chest and dragged him back several feet before exploding.   
When ringing in their heads started to ease, Raul turned to Spotty.  
"Why did you do that, boss?!" he groaned. Spotty shrugged and swept blood from it's face.  
"I don't know. I'm high and I always wanted to test that, I guess", Spotty answered and grinned. Raul couldn't help but smile.  
"That was damn loco. But I have to admit, it looked cool."

Spotty sat on a barrel, legs shaky, and licked it's razor blade. Raul grabbed it from Spotty's hold.  
"What on earth are you doing, boss?! We don't eat humans!" he yelled and put the thing into his pocket. Spotty blinked in confusion.  
"It feels so nice... Come on, Raul. Let me have a little", it begged, looking at it's friend with watery eyes. Raul slapped it's cheek gently.  
"Spotty, we do not eat humans", he told. But damn, the idea sounded great in some twisted way. The smell of fresh blood in the air was intoxicating and his whole body demanded more...  
Spotty got up clumsily and nudged Raul. He stepped back and grabbed Spotty's wrist. His heart was beating so hard it was hard to think straight but he wouldn't fight his best friend...  
"Come on, Raul. I know you aren't done yet", Spotty growled and tackled Raul to the ground, falling with him. Raul punched Spotty and rolled away from it. Spotty punched back and grinned. "Spotty's playing with me", Raul realized.  
And if you put up a fight with vaquero, you're going to have one hell of a fight.

They laid on the ground, sweaty and panting. Raul's forearms had started to seep again. Spotty spat bloody saliva and gasped.  
"You wanna fuck?" it snarled to Raul and grinned. The man's eyes widened.  
"What? I'm not into... Fuck, boss! You've gone feral, haven't you?" he muttered, crawling to a sitting position. Spotty emitted a choked laughter.  
"Not me, for fuck's sake! You wanna fuck whores, Raul?" it answered, rubbing it's face clean. Raul was a good opponent for sure. A little too good, actually. Spotty flinched as it's fingers reached it's left cheek. But he had held back quite a lot, and Spotty knew that.  
"I don't think that would be..." Raul tried and offered a hand for the other ghoul. Spotty got up slowly and winked.  
"You won those bets, Raul. I'll pay. Just say where you want to go", it promised and rubbed it's sore cheek:  
"And if you don't mind, we should go grab some chow as well. I'm still fucking starving. " Raul nodded:  
"Me too, boss. But no more human for you."

"You said no more human", Spotty mumbled, mouth full of Wrangler's infamous Sunday stew. It was Thursday already so the Garrets had been more than happy to sell the whole pot for a couple of caps.   
"I didn't mean you should eat every damn thing except humans, boss", Raul snarked and took a bite of jerky. He wasn't going to put that thing anywhere near his mouth. Spotty scooped some more to it's mouth, a blissful smile lighting it's face. Raul hated to admit it, but he was more horny than hungry. Thinking about whores made him uneasy, however. What would they say about a ghoul like him...? Spotty seemed to read his mind.  
"Want some advice? You should try either Beatrix or that blonde country girl, Anna. Sure, she looks like a girl next door but she won't even wince", it growled, face still bloody and dusty:  
"You pick first, I'll get the other one."  
That made Raul feel even more nervous. Was Spotty testing him? What was this about?   
"Relax, pal. Have a little more candy", Spotty whispered and slipped him more Mentats under the table. Raul frowned. This crazy Courier would get him to an early, shallow grave... Well, maybe not very early?  
"I dare you, ol' vaquero", Spotty rattled and took a couple of pills itself.  
"I thought you were a quick draw, Raul. Too bad, I'll take Beatrix, you'll have to do with Anna."  
Raul still wasn't sure. He swallowed his Mentats and closed his eyes for a while. Bitterness on his tongue melted to a giddy tickle once more. His body was flushed with sweet radiation and the world around him got softer and grainier yet more colorful. Like old world commercials.  
"Raul? You want the country girl or not? Her ass is chubby like a cushion", Spotty called.

When Raul was done with the girl, he headed downstairs for a drink. He felt... Great, actually. Weary, sore and damn great.  
Spotty limped down a while later like a manged penguin. Raul had a hard time swallowing his laughter. The creature looked...   
"How much you are into ghouls, boss? Or was she elbow-deep into you?", he chuckled and handed his friend a pintful of vodka. (Because that's what it takes to get a ghoul drunk.)   
Damn, he had to be still sky-high. He'd never talk like that to his boss sober. Spotty blushed and hid it's face behind the pint.  
"I'm not into all ghouls, Raul. Just the badass, rough cowboy ones", it answered, giggling. What a great way to escape the other question. And to make Raul bothered as fuck.  
"So... You aren't into ghouls?", Spotty asked after both of them had calmed their nerves with some liquor. Raul frowned.  
"I don't know, boss. Haven't actually tried one", he admitted and shrugged. Spotty's grin was wide and wild.  
"Wanna try?" it asked, rattling and giggling. Raul sighed.  
"You are baked crispy, Spotty. Give me that vodka, we go home and get you to bed. Now", he growled and wrapped his arm around the other ghoul.  
"Your bed? Or we can go pick up Beatrix with us, she's just..." it mumbled but followed Raul obediently.  
"Shut up already, boss. If you remember any of this tomorrow, I bet fifty caps you won't even talk to me about it."  
" I bet a hundred I'll want to do this all over again."  
"Yeah, sure boss."

"Is there any chance you might kill me, Raul?", Spotty groaned from it's bed. Raul emitted a pained grunt and tossed a water bottle next to his friend. His knees and hips were aching so bad he couldn't walk.  
"Are you... I mean, are you back to cutting yourself?", Spotty asked and took a sip of water. It tasted like piss. Or more accurately, everything tasted like piss. Raul shook his hurting head.  
"Hell no. I'm sore enough already. God, boss... We're too old to do things like this", he moaned and leaned against a table. Spotty laughed weakly:  
"'Bullshit, Raul. Don't you remember what we did yesterday? That's not old man's work, huh?"  
"The day before yesterday, Spotty. We were passed out for... Twenty five hours or something", Raul muttered. But it was true. He didn't feel like an old man. He felt like an adolescent who had partied way too hard.  
"But we can't do this every time ol' Raul gets moody, boss", he added. Spotty grinned and tried not to throw up.  
"Why not? We're adults, Raul: we can do what we want. Plus, we were damn effective", it muttered. Raul felt a boyish grin spreading on his face.  
"I guess you're right, boss. But an old ghoul like me needs a sick leave first. Three days?"  
"Make it four", Spotty groaned and vomited on the floor.


End file.
